It’s been awhile since I have blogged. I usually only do it when I get punished, because he insists on it. I have been traveling and dealing with back problems and I have been good so I have been super lucky and have not got in trouble for a long time.
Last night I got spanked with his belt. He was hitting hard and I think I might be extra sensitive because I haven’t been in trouble for awhile. Because it hurt a lot and wasn’t close to as long or as much as I have taken in the past.
While not getting in trouble all the time and rules being super lax, I decided I really enjoyed the freedom and sense of being in charge of myself. I am trying to convince him that we need to go more towards this direction instead of the one he wants to go which is super high control mode. I think this is ridiculous because first of all our busy lives really don’t allow for it, secondly it’s up and down and I never know what’s going to get me in trouble from one day to the next so I end up saying “f***” it, and lastly I think I can handle less control and so can he. I think less control is the answer, he thinks more is the answer. So here we are with our strange tug of war.
Last night he said that I am his property and I am owned. He said that he is going to remind me what being owned is and he got all quiet in his ” scarey voice ” in my ear. So I guess we will all have to find out the next chapter of this story together, because right now I am just not sure what the future holds for us.